Blog? BLARG!

So... I guess the only writing that's happening 'round here is to my parents. I am reposting this weeks letter to them.

Dear Elder and Sister Mymaidenname, Conversations at the dinner table: Lilac: Mama, why do the cans of chips always have that face on them? Bon: Well, do you remember when we talked this morning about the picture of the kangaroo on the can of hairspray, how people will know quickly by the picture, what brand the hairspray is, and how the companies who make them want you to to buy their brand so they make more money? It's called a "Logo," and that face there is the Pringles logo. Dadguy: Yeah, also it used to be that not everybody could read, so they put logos and sometimes they put pictures of things on the cans so you know what you are getting (points to a bottle of ketchup on the table). What's that on that bottle? Lilac: A TOMATO! So you know that it's tomatos in the ketchup! Dadguy: And see how there is also a picture of chips on the front of the can of chips? Lilac: Yeah! And what picture does the mayonnaise have on it? Pearl: A bow? Why does it have a bow on it? Dadguy: (disgusted look on his face) That's 'cause you don't WANT to know what's in mayonnaise. *********************************************************************** Tuesday is the start of school for Birdie and Lilac... it will be Lilac's first time going alllll day long. First grade. Wooo. I tell ya who's looking forward to school starting... it's PEARL! She's gonna be the big sister every day. She's gonna be the one picking out the movies to watch, the books for Mama to read, the one to get the hotly contended rose plate. And during Henrys naps... it's going to be just Pearl and Mama. I am pretty sure that the best part of that list for the kiddo is the rose plate. This past week Robbie (my big sis) went to Education Week at BYU, and we kept Ethan (nephew) overnight, not only to facilitate watching him for two days in a row, but because the girls were really wanting to have him over for a sleepover. Had some pretty dang funny conversations and a lot of fun with him over... but the highlight for me is that I finally got a recipe for chocolate zucchini cake that pleases me. Everyone realy loved it, and that's pretty darned impressive when you consider that the sucker is 100% whole wheat and packed with zucchini! I covered it with a cream cheese frosting and some big candy sprinkles, and it got sucked down by all. That's a mighty good thing, cuz boy. Do we EVER have zucchini coming out our ears. I am guessing someone at the store where we bought our starter plants swapped out the little cards poked in the dirt of a flat of summer squash, cuz I have about four more 'cchini plants that I had meant... and not one solitary yellow squash.... dagger sized all the way up to big ol' two handed broadsword size. Seriously... I have a couple of green baseball bats up there on my kitchen counter. I threaten my children with them, that and now finally the cake is just about the only joy I get out of 'em. I have put zucchini in just about everything... did you know it is virtually undetectable in spaghetti sauce, salad dressing and salsa? Just never, ever try to slide it by in a smoothy. Ain't gonna happen. Ever. Unless... maybe if I cook it down first. Now THERE'S and idea I haven't tried yet! Thinking about peeling it, boiling it and running it thru the blender in order to sneak it into mashed potatoes. Shhhhhh... don't tell anyone. Hmmm... I have a buddy who hides sweet potatoes in her Kraft Mac 'n Cheese... whddaya think about a little bit o' Zucch in there? No? Oh well. I sure do love you guys... think about ya, and pray for ya too. This morning the girls drew some pictures for you... and since we cannot find our scanner cable, I will be shipping 'em out via snails. In case you can't figure it out when you get the cards and pictures, Pearl drew a picture of our family... if we were a family of evil cats. I get the distinction of being the Evilest. Cat. Everrrrr. If you were wondering. Hasta la pasta -the Mama

Where DID July Go?

I have started several posts in the past couple of weeks. I have thought about it, really I have. I just get so tired when I try to think about how to actually write the things that I am thinking about. It's just too hard.

So I am gonna give myself permission to be more stream-of-consciousness than I have allowed myself lately, just so's I can get started again. And yep, I am gonna let myself whine and bitch a little too.

I am sad to see some of my ideas go by the wayside, I just can't develop them right now. Four kids, y'all. I am maxed out. Plus there has been the issue of the fact that I have probably spent the past year or so wayyy low on thyroid. I switched doctors a few months back, and I feel like crying when it becomes clear that the last set of docs, or the lab they used, or something in the mix has kept me disastrously low. Man, I trusted those jokers with my health. It took a year of astoundingly poor health, 30 pounds of weight gain, exhaustion, hair loss and depression before I finally gave up on those shmoes. And I am having a hard time not beating myself for figuring it out earlier, for taking such poor care of myself. I know better. I know better.

It is what it is... I just hope I can get enough hair back that I can spend less time on my comb-over strategies to hide my bald spots.

Fact is... some days I just want to run away. But just for a week. Ya know? Or maybe a month. I'd like to get a pedicure, a passport and a ticket to hide out. Faaaar away. Where no one needs me to feed them, or dress them, or clean them or clean up after them. Where I am not having to be on my toes for "teaching opportunities" or asking the right questions or listening to the meandering and halting stories of four year olds. Feel guilty for letting the kids watch yet another episode of Invader Zim on Netflix, for not taking them to the library enough, or yelling at them.

Really, it's been a great summer. I am getting back to normal-ish, and of course that's good.

But, I dream of just being plain old me for a little while.